Hi, I'm a girl who isn't usually shy, but when it comes to this, I hardly dare be my real self for anyone, only a few that I have had to be honest with.
I am bisexual. I'm afraid to admit it, afraid of being looked down on. I have never been against gays or bisexuals. I've always been on their side, but I know many people have prejudices. I wonder if I come straight out with it, and if I do, who to! Friends? Family? Everyone? Or is it normal to keep it dark! I don't know what to do anymore, I've almost almost said it openly, but not yet. Answer quickly!!!
Hi dear!
We've answered to other people with similar questions before: How to tell about homosexual feelings.
It is not easy to feel something you do not dare to tell even to the people closest to you and who you should be able to trust most and, as you say, it feels like you are not being yourself with them.
On the other hand, it's not as if everybody has a God-given right to know everything you happen to feel and think! We are allowed to choose what we decide to tell and who we want to tell it to. But when you only keep these thoughts to yourself, it can sometimes make things loom larger and seem more difficult than they really are. So it's a good idea to talk to someone you can trust. Getting feedback about what you feel and think from someone can unburden the pressure inside. In the first place, maybe you should tell mom and dad, or other adults you trust, or for example, a health nurse, pastor or a soulmate. When you begin to feel more secure safer in yourself, and sure about your identity, you will find easier to decide who else you want to tell.
You don't say anything about how old you are, but during their teens, quite a lot of people get feelings about people of the same sex and about the opposite sex, both at the same time. This doesn't necessarily mean that they are gay, lesbians or bisexuals, because emotions like these can develop and change as time goes on. Therefore, it is not usual to consider someone is gay or bisexual unless they've had these feelings for a number of years. It's precisely because emotions fluctuate in someone's teens, that it is generally too early to say whether someone really is gay, lesbian or bisexual. Usually you wait to say that kind of thing until they are an adult and their emotions have stabilized.
You are, unfortunately, right about many judging and looking down on others, and naturally that makes it difficult to be open about what you feel. Whether a person chooses to call themself gay or not, is a matter of their own personal choosing and has to be respected. Some people who feel gay/bisexual emotions continually for many years choose to say so, while others decide not to tell anyone else. But most people find living with their feelings is much easier if they have someone they can talk to openly.
Sincerely, BoyandGirl.info