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Waiting for sex – a dilemma!

I’m in a dilemma! A lot of Christian youths want to wait until they’re married to have sex. They know what they want, and so they don’t need contraception when they’re with their boyfriend or girlfriend. But what happens if they go too far again and again? They regret it every time, and say it won’t happen again. And since it won’t happen again, they don’t start to use contraception, as that would mean that they assume it will happen again. This is a tough question! We need to talk more about this!


You’re totally right that this is something we need to talk about more. Waiting till you’re married before having sex is not as easy as it sounds. There will always be a temptation to do something you have actually decided not to do, and then you need to talk with each other and decide on clear limits that you will keep.

The fact that something is difficult is not the same as it being impossible. But if you’ve decided to wait till you’re married before you have sex, it is important to avoid situations where the temptation is too great. So for example it would be a bad idea to spend the night with each other or to be alone a whole lot. You may also find it helpful to talk about this with a church leader. It can often be helpful to be accountable to someone who will ask you how things are going.

God will of course forgive you if you have gone too far in this area, but it’s really foolish to go against your conscience when you are a Christian and when you know what the Bible says about sex. A lot of people struggle with feelings of guilt in relation to sex, even though God has forgiven them.

We believe that it is a great idea to wait until marriage before you have sex. There is a price to pay, but the reward comes later, when you are married. Knowing what actually happens when two people have sex can really help your motivation too, you can read the following to find out more: The invisible reality of sex


Best wishes


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