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What should I do when I’m in love?

Hi … I love your website … I’ve got three questions … 1: Is it wrong to be in love with someone a year older than me? (I’m 14 and he’s 15). 2: I want to ask him but I don’t dare … what should I say to him? (He likes me too.) 3: I’m a bit scared of talking to him, but he makes me feel warm inside … because he likes to say things to me … What should I do?


1: It’s not wrong at all to be in love! The teenage years are full of emotions and romances and they come and go without us planning them. We can fall in love with good people and also with people who are not good for us. That’s why we can’t trust our feelings of being in love, and just follow them blindly.

2: Maybe you should wait before you ask him to be your boyfriend, or if he likes you. You can try to get to know him better, and become good friends, since you like him. Try to be brave and chat with him and include him in your group of friends. When we try to get to know someone, it can be a good idea to ask and show interest in what they like in terms of hobbies and activities. If you do this, then you will soon find out if he is the kind of person you would really like to have as a boyfriend. It’s a good idea not to have him as a boyfriend at first, just because of feeling that you’re in love, as our feelings are unstable and can quickly change. It could quickly end up with both of you getting hurt because your, or his feelings change, and you have to break up. If you take time to get to know each other and become friends first, you will find out if you like each other as people and if you go well together. Then you will have a better foundation for choosing to be boyfriend and girlfriend, and the relationship can last.

3. You write that he likes to say nice things to you, but that you don’t dare to speak to him. It is really great to be encouraged and get compliments from someone you like! At the same time, it is hard to act naturally when you are in love. You can feel overwhelmed and that you don’t know what to say, your mouth can go dry, and your hands go sweaty, and you can experience all sorts of strange feelings that you don’t normally get when you talk to someone. The best thing you can do is to try to be friends, and get to know him better, and then it will be easier to chat and to act naturally when you are together. You can start by smiling, and then you can ask him if he’d like to join you and your friends when you plan to do something (if he’s not already in that group.) Bring a friend and sit at the same table, and talk together first, then it will be easier for you to talk to him and relax and be a bit more natural when he is nearby. You can talk about life, school, hobbies, and all the things that teenagers talk about. It’s a good idea to find out if there are more than just romantic feelings between you. By being friends you can find out if you have anything in common which you can build on. We at boyandgirl.info think that a romantic relationship is the start of a relationship that will lead to marriage.

You can also read: Should I start dating? / Start dating at 14? / Is it wrong to date? / Finding a sweetheart / Are you in love with the right person?

Best wishes, boyandgirl.info

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