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How do I become more outgoing?

How can I be more outgoing?
I’m so shy when I meet new people, and it’s embarrassing! I really hate it. It always takes me a long time to make new friends when I’m in a new place, and I think it’s just horrible to have the personality that I have!


Thanks for your question. 

We really understand that it can feel terrible when you sit with a group of people and don’t really know what to say or do. It’s important to remember that this doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with you. People react differently to different situations and a lot of people find it hard to meet new people.

About your question, on how to become more extrovert, there really isn’t a right answer to this. But we’ll try to make some suggestions that can maybe help you.

When you know that you’re going to a place where you might meet new people, it can help to think about what to talk about in advance. It depends on which setting you meet the people in, but you might have some interests in common. After that, you just have to force yourself to talk. This can be very difficult, and it might be embarrassing to start with, but there’s only one thing that will help you get better at something you’re bad at: practice!

You might also like: It's hard to get to know people

It can often help to talk to a friend. If you’re going somewhere with a friend, then maybe they can help you start a conversation? Just tell them how you feel. Tell them that you are a bit shy and that you often find it hard to talk to new people. By doing this, things might get easier.

Last but not least we recommend you involve Jesus in everything you do. Turn to Him in prayer and put the day and the conversation in His hands. We can’t promise that everything will suddenly be much better, but He has promised to be with us always, until the end of the world, so that gives us confidence!

If you feel that this was not of so much help, then maybe there’s someone you trust, like parents, a youth pastor, a teacher or someone else you can talk to? It’s always good to have someone to talk to, and someone who knows you can often advise you and stand with you in difficult situations.

We hope this gets easier as time passes, and we wish you all the best! 

You can also read these answers we’ve written to similar questions: 
It's hard to know what to say
How to have a good conversation

Best wishes, boyandgirl.info

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